


Up For a Challenge

by elrhiarhodan



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Apologies, M/M, Masturbation, Pi, UST
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-08
Updated: 2015-05-08
Packaged: 2018-03-29 12:58:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3897217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elrhiarhodan/pseuds/elrhiarhodan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>:  Steve owes Tony an apology.  Somehow, he ends up goading Tony into jerking off.  And reciting Pi.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Up For a Challenge

He and Tony were in sort of a weird place. They weren't quite friends, but they certainly weren't enemies. They bitched and sniped and jerked each other's chain, but they respected each other, too. At first, it was so strange. He'd look at Tony and see Howard, and he'd see the speculation in Tony's eyes. And something more – confusion. As if he was a puzzle that the great Tony Stark couldn't quite figure out.

Steve didn't spend a lot of time in New York, especially since Fury kept him busy at S.H.I.E.L.D. headquarters, heading all sorts of rescue and cleanup missions. But he was there a couple of times a month, for this and for that and when Tony offered him space in that big, ugly building in the heart of Manhattan, it would have been stupid to refuse. It was better than a hotel, and he was well aware that he was just exchanging one set of ears - S.H.I.E.L.D.'s – for another – Tony's. 

And frankly, JARVIS was a decent sort, for an almost all-powerful A.I. who controlled just about everything.

After New York and Loki and the Chitauri, Tony hadn't been spending a lot of time in Stark Tower, and Steve had felt a little funny about using the place when Tony wasn't around. He even mentioned it once, and Tony called him "Capsicle" and gave him other look – the one that said, "Did all your brain cells freeze to death when you were on the ice?"

But for all that momentary contempt, Tony also made it a point to call and chat with him whenever Steve was in New York, but when he – Tony – wasn't. That made Steve laugh – the great Tony Stark, _genius, billionaire, ~~playboy~~ asshole, philanthropist_ , had a heart made of marshmallow.

Tony had started spending more time in New York after all hell broke loose with the Mandarin and Extremis (Fury actually let him read part of the mission report) and Steve felt a little sorry for him - he seemed to have lost something with his girl - Pepper, who'd remained in L.A. to run Stark Industries. Not that Tony would say anything about it. 

This morning, Fury had sent him up to New York to investigate some more missing Chitauri weaponry and he’d spent much of the day chasing dead leads. He might have been annoyed at the pointless waste of time, but he was actually looking forward to spending the evening at Stark Tower. 

Tonight, Tony was in residence and so was Bruce, and the two of them were joined at the brain. Steve didn't mind being ignored – it was kind of fun watching them work, watching them think out loud about process and cause and effect. Bruce was good for Tony – he seemed to take his wilder flights of fancy and tame them, and Tony was good for Bruce, too. He'd tease and poke and prod at Bruce, urging him to live and letting him test the limits of his control. He was Bruce's friend without any strings attached. 

Steve watched the two of them and realized, if there was one moment in his life when he was truly ashamed of something he'd done, it was that moment on the helicarrier, when he'd said that Tony was nothing more than a big man in a suit of armor.

He took a sip of Tony's excellent whiskey and wished that the serum hadn't taken away his ability to get good and stinking drunk. 

"You okay?"

Steve looked up and Tony was stand there. Bruce, though, was nowhere in sight.

Tony must have read his mind. "I actually think I tired his brain out."

Steve chuckled. "I didn't think it was possible."

"We were talking quantum theory and the models started growing exponentially." Tony kept talking and Steve tried to listen, but the train of thought that was Tony Stark left him at the station, bags in hand and a stupid expression on his face.

"Sorry – didn't mean to bore you."

Steve wasn't his mother's son for nothing, and he apologized. "No, you weren't boring me."

"Then you always go glassy-eyed and start to drool when people are talking?"

"I wasn't drooling." But he couldn't help himself; he wiped his lips and chin. To his relief, his hand stayed dry.

Tony didn't say anything, but his smirk spoke volumes. _Typical_.

They sat in silence. Steve poured himself another whiskey and tried to find the right words , when Tony asked, "What's on your mind?"

"Huh?"

"You seem unusually self-absorbed. Just wondering what's going on inside your head. I had a golden retriever once that got that exact same expression on his face whenever he needed to go out and poop.

That got a genuine laugh out of him. Trust Tony to say something completely, utterly outrageous, and somehow make things a little better. 

"Well?"

Still smiling, Steve sighed. "I was just remembering something. You ever do something really embarrassing?"

Tony blinked. "You're kidding me, right?"

Then Steve remembered just who he was talking to. "Ah, yeah. I mean, something that you really regret."

"Seriously?"

"Okay – did you ever say something to someone and then realize what a jackass you were?"

Tony stared at him. "You know I've made a career out of making a jackass out of myself. JARVIS can probably pull of the highlights in a couple of nanoseconds."

Steve shook his head, "What I mean is, did you ever say something that was – well, deliberately hurtful and completely wrong?"

"I can call Pepper and she can give you the complete rundown of every other conversation we've ever had." Tony poured a glass of whiskey for himself and leaned back, staring at him over the rim of the glass. "What did you do?"

Steve decided to stop digging himself a hole. "I own you an apology."

"For what?"

"I called you a coward."

"Huh?" Tony seemed thoroughly confused.

"Back on the helicarrier. After I found the Phase 2 weapons, just before Loki attacked."

"Really?"

Steve nodded.

"Oh, right. The whole 'big man in a suit of armor' speech and then the wire and grenade metaphor. Don't worry about it; I think I got my own back."

"That's not the point, Tony. I was pretty awful to you."

"So?"

"Doesn't it bother you?"

"I'm really not the type to hold a grudge, you know. Besides, I think I did a spectacular job of proving you wrong. The whole taking the nuke into the portal thing, saving New York from Armageddon, nearly dying in the process."

"Yeah, you certainly proved me wrong - deeds, not words."

"Pretty much."

Tony took a sip of his whiskey. "Apology accepted, though."

"Thanks." Steve wasn't quite ready to call it a night. "So, what was your most embarrassing moment?"

Tony thought for a moment. "I was fourteen, a sophomore at MIT and my balls had just dropped. I'd gotten myself invited to a frat party at BU and …”

“Wait - you were fourteen and at a frat party?”

Tony shrugged. “I was precocious, what can I say.”

Steve didn’t doubt it.

“So - you want to hear the tale of Tony Stark’s most embarrassing moment?”

“Yes, please.”

Tony finished his whiskey and chuckled to himself. “Anyway, as I was saying - I was at a frat party and this guy - big and beefy, with stupid written across his forehead - made some smartass comment about how kids shouldn’t go to college until they’re old enough to jerk one off.”

Steve could see where this story was heading, “Oh boy - wrong thing to say to you.”

“Exactly. Like I said, my balls had dropped and frankly, when I wasn’t in class or in a garage, I was discovering everything that Little Tony could do.”

Maybe he still could get drunk, because something about that struck him as hilarious. “Little Tony, come on!”

“Okay, how about Not-So-Little Tony, and I was fourteen and still growing.”

“So, what did you do?”

“Challenged the meathead to a jerkoff contest.”

“Why am I not surprised?” Then Steve remembered the purpose of the story. “So - how did you embarrass yourself? Couldn’t get it up?”

“Don’t be insulting, Capsicle.”

Steve hated that nickname and knew that Tony knew. So he must have touched a nerve. “Okay, if not - then what happened.”

Tony relaxed. “I thought I’d make the challenge interesting. The winner was the one who could recite the most digits of Pi before shooting his load.”

“And the meathead beat you?”

“Hardly. I only made it to the two hundred and fifteenth digit before Not-So-Little Tony blew, right into the Meathead’s face.” He stared at Steve, practically daring him to call him a liar.

Steve licked his lips, and did the one thing that Tony probably never expected. He said, “Prove it.”

__

FIN

**Author's Note:**

> The challenge is continued in [Prove It](http://archiveofourown.org/works/3906058)


End file.
